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LOL Jets: Pummeled by San Francisco 49ers B-Team

The LOL Jets are so bad they couldn’t beat a team stricken with injuries to their starting QB, RB, TE, CB, and DE. The San Francisco 49ers didn’t have George Kittle (knee) and Richard Sherman (calf) coming into Week 2 against the Jets. Then, the Niners lost Jimmy Garoppolo (ankle), Raheem Mostert (knee), and Nick Bosa (knee) to injuries during the game. The Jets still couldn’t make it a close sweat, and lost 31-13 to start the season 0-2.

NY Jets head coach Adam Gase with rookie lineman Mekhi Becton. (Image: Chris Pedota/USA Today Sports)

In 2020, we shall fade the LOL Jets every single weekend. If you’ve been betting against Gang Green along with us starting with Week 1’s loss to the Buffalo Bills, then you’re 2-0 thus far in the season.

As a life-long suffering Jets fan, it’s just a wise move to bet against the inept Jets this season. Fading the Jets this season will boost your mental health and your bankroll.


FADE THE LOL JETS

The bookies were being kind to the Jets in Week 2. The point spread should have been significantly higher against a team that went all the way to the Super Bowl last season. The Jets were home dogs against the Niners and getting +7 in the old Meadowlands. You could have put a one in front of the seven, and I still would have faded the Jets at +17.

The Niners (1-1) got back on track after a Week 1 loss to the Arizona Cardinals, but their victory came at a huge cost considering the multiple injuries, especially after losing Nick Bosa for the season with a blown-out ACL courtesy of the crappy new turf at MetLife Stadium.

Week 2: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

There’s nothing good to come out of Week 2, aside from the fact we turned a quick profit fading the LOL Jets. Since the start of last season, the Jets are 7-11 against the spread.

The LOL Jets demonstrated the definition of bad offense once again against San Francisco. The offense couldn’t string together a legit scoring drive without Le’Veon Bell (hamstring), and the rushing attack barely cracked the century mark (104 yards). The Jets came into Week 2 without their top WR Jamison Crowder due to a hamstring injury. Their bad luck continued when #2 wideout Breshad Perriman injured his ankle early in the game.

Did you know that “Darnold” is translated from German as “garbage-time touchdown”? Darnold tossed a touchdown to fourth-stringer Braxton Berrios with under two minutes to go to make the final score 31-13. In Week 1, Darnold padded his stats with a garbage-time TD against the Buffalo Bills.

The LOL Jets were just as ugly on defense. The Jets’ defense allowed three touchdowns in the first half, including an 80-yard touchdown run from Raheem Mostert on the first play of the game. No one on Gang Green’s defense touched Mostert either. After just one play, the Jets were down 7-0. Then, things only got worse.

Jimmy G connected with Jordan Reed for two touchdown passes in the second quarter before he sat out the second half with a high ankle sprain. The Jets secondary is deeply missing Jamal Adams after Jimmy G and the San Francisco carved them up. Adams is laughing his butt off right now in Seattle with Pete Carroll about the LOL Jets embarrassing loss against the Niners.

Fire Adam Gase

Week 2 hadn’t even started before the boo birds came out in numbers calling for Gase’s immediate dismissal. After the San Francisco debacle, the tri-state area will be teaming over with discontent over the latest ass-kicking.

The old guard, boomer Jets fans who fell in love with Broadway Joe Namath and the team that won Super Bowl III, kvetched about Gase to sports radio jockeys on WFAN  The jaded Gen Xers spewed venom on their Jets podcasts and blogs. The newest generation of Gang Green, the millennials and Zoomers born into the “butt-fumble” era of humiliation, bombarded social media with Jets memes, poo emojis, and #FireGase hashtags.

It’s only a matter of time before Gase gets fired. So, why not do it now? Maybe, the Jets can salvage the season before he completely ruins Sam Darnold? Please hand over the keys to defensive coordinator Gregg Williams. He’s already the de facto head coach. Meanwhile, Gase continues to be a glorified quarterback coach who Forest Gump’d his way into a head coaching job in the Big Apple.

“I think he can work with and develop quarterbacks,” said Jets CEO Chris Johnson. “I continue to think he’s a brilliant offensive mind especially. He has my every confidence.”

Chris, the brother of Jets owner Woody Johnson, sounds like he’s been ingesting too many pot brownies with that half-baked “brilliant offensive mind” assessment. Gase, the so-called offensive genius, saw his teams ranked in the bottom five in points scored the last three seasons.

Did you know that in 18 games as the head coach of the Jets, Gase guided the Jets to 98 punts and only 34 touchdowns? A punt to TD ratio at 3 to 1? That’s genius!

On Deck: Phil Rivers and Colts in Week 3

In Week 3, the LOL Jets (0-2) hit the road to play the Indianapolis Colts (1-1). The Colts bounced back from a Week 1 upset loss to the Jacksonville Jaguars to defeat the Minnesota Vikings 28-11 in Week 2.

Philip Rivers might be old, but even the five worst games of his career were better than anything the Jets strung together in the last couple of seasons.

The Jets are an underdog by more than a touchdown. According to the look-ahead line by the Westgate SuperBook in Las Vegas, the Jets opened at +7. You can currently find the Jets at +9.5 at Indianapolis in Week 3.

Let’s continue to fade the LOL Jets until they fire Gase.

For weekly musings of a tortured New York Jets fan, take a look at more columns on the LOL Jets.